Posts Tagged ‘heart’

Half Heartedly

Wednesday, March 21st, 2012

I fret back and forth,
Bite my fingers for a moment
Hide it by tilting my face away
Look, look away
Tilt my head this way and that
Frame my face with worried fingers
Supporting my chin on my hand
Purse my lips, bite my lip
Look back again
Like a thunder clap
It brings me back again
The clouds over my face part
I smile half-heartedly
I have to go
She looks up at me with an odd look
Lurking in her stormy grey eyes
They are her father’s
So much like her father
I begin to bite my nails again
Flick my eyes off towards the window
Throwing my attention across the room
So I don’t have to look at her
Question looming in those haunting eyes
A light but insistent tug on my dress
Brings me back
I look down and smile
Half heartedly
You are going to have so much fun
I place my shaking hand on the top of her head
Feeling her feathery hair
Trace my finger along the red ribbon twisted
Among the feathers of her hair
So soft and smooth
So much fun
I mutter to myself as my attention drifts away again
–the bus
the honk hits me like a slap to the face
I wince slightly
Clawing to bring me back to her to here
I really have to go now
She reaches up with her little hands and turns
The door knob slowly and with effort
I place my hand over hers
Helping her open the door that is too big for her
I feel the softness of her unmarred hands
I wonder if she feels the bones of my fingers
The sadness etched lines of my hands
It swings open
She runs out the door
Like a clumsy fawn
Her back pack shifting back and forth
The monster in front of the house waits
Taking her away from me
I hover at the doorway
Unwilling to leave the threshold
But unwilling to let her go
A desperate yell
Bursts from my breaking heart
She stops and looks back at me
That question still hiding in her eyes
I hesitate for only a moment
And depart from the sanctuary
Running down the little walkway
On legs atrophied with sorrow
I stop before her
She says nothing
Just looks up at me with stormy eyes
Innocent and curious
I grab the end of the red ribbon
Which had come undone on her escape from the house
I kneel in front of her
And tie the ribbon with foolish hands
That shake even as I smile
And look into her eyes
I smooth her hair when I am finished
Put my hands whittled away with grief
On her small shoulders
Let out a sigh
That wanted to be a scream
And watch
As she faintly smiles and turns away
The monster honks again
Taking her away from me
I slowly stand as the bus drives away
Leaving me on the shores of my sorrow
With half a heart.


Mossy Love

Wednesday, February 10th, 2010

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Posted in Photos |

The Starving Musician

Friday, October 23rd, 2009

I got this poem published in the school newspaper, for those that didn’t get to see it, here it is.

He plays the piano
Rocking back and forth
Cradling each note
Giving life
But holding onto each
For just a single moment
Before it is released
Sent out into the cold world
To die or survive
It all lay in fate’s hands
Not his
Not anymore
The artist, the musician
With starving eyes
And frantic fingers
He swayed
With his head held back
Listening to the birth
Of each note
As it sprung forth
From nothingness
But the barren plane of his soul
He breathed life
Into each ivory key
As his fingers danced
Playing a sad
Yet beautiful song
The song of the sirens
Set out at sea
The bewitching words
Of a long forgotten curse
The notes passed through
His ragged body
Each throb of his veins
Pushed tired blood and music
That begged for life
And took everything
From it’s living master
A master who would die
For his masterpiece
With bleeding fingers
Pressed against bone keys
Each print left
On the piano
Left it’s bloodied print
On his haunted soul
But when the music
Has finally left
He has nothing
Is nothing
But a starving artist
Deprived of paint
He has nothing left
He gave it all up
For his sacred art
His Bible of notes
Gave his heart and soul
And all else he could give
But his ears to listen
And his fingers to play
As he cradled each new life
And sent it away

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Posted in Poetry |

Wire Heart

Thursday, October 15th, 2009


My latest piece of nothing art I did in ib art. I gave it to my brother for his birthday. It is a wire 3-D heart with a key I paint red in the middle. I think I might make a series of these with different objects in the middle. Not sure, maybe if I have time.

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Posted in Photos |


Wednesday, September 16th, 2009

How fast does
The human heart die
When a cry
Is all that portrays
A desperate agony
The sound of a heart
Ripping itself into pieces
“No more” it cries
“I am done
It hurts too much
To keep going”
So does it take years
Or maybe only seconds
For the heart to implode
Slowly collapse in on itself
To bleed out on the streets
Where people watch
But no one moves
To save an innocent from death
There is just a silent horror
Reflected in dull empty eyes
Watch as a hand
Dips into my chest
Pulls out my heart
It cries and it cries
“I am done, I am done”
One last rebellion
To die before the sun
It was hidden away
For it’s whole life
Now in death it is shown
Looking into the light

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Posted in Poetry |


Wednesday, September 9th, 2009

This is the beginning of a story I am working on, not sure where it will go if it does go somewhere. I thought it was interesting though and thought I would share this little excerpt. Enjoy

This is the way the heart dies. It dies slowly without a sound. Some people never even notice when it is gone. The person still stands put nothing inside remains.

We have nothing left but misery, an empty hole that gapes yawning in its existence. When the clock stops ticking what will you do? Where will you go?

Nowhere. A place called Nowhere.

This is the land of the dead, where only a body wonders with no heart intact. But how do you save a dying heart? Can you bring it back to life with a wish? Can a final kiss wake it up with a smile and say good morning?

“Welcome to Nowhere” Death says.

“Come join us, we the walking dead. We who live without mind or soul. “

I walked into Nowhere with no intent of leaving. I had abandoned my heart and its misery because I couldn’t take it, I couldn’t handle it anymore. Being human hurt too much. I walked through my life without a second thought as to what I was missing. Just waiting for an end.

Sometimes, life just happens. Even if you don’t want it. My life happened to me as I stood a bystander to a catastrophe.

A woman died today, I did not know her. I never wanted to meet her. I never knew her name, or anything about her. But she saved me. She saved me from myself.

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Posted in Stories |