Posts Tagged ‘evil’


Wednesday, March 16th, 2011

These amazingly fuzzy and funny looking creatures are just another species on my list of cute yet simultaneously frightening animals. I just feel constantly watched around them because of their huge eyes. It is just creepy and look slightly malevolent.

That is a face that screams, Yeah just get a little closer so I can bite your finger off. So creepy yet so fuzzy looking. It is like a death trap, you just want to get close and give it a pet but you know if you get too close it will eat your face. They are tricky animals, crazy one moment and totally zen the next.

What can I say, I am just attracted to deceiving animals. Why can’t they al just be simply cute?


Adorable yet Evil Animals

Sunday, January 9th, 2011

The peacock is a truly magnificent animal with dazzling colors, long majestic feathers, and beautiful patterns. However it is actually a relatively mean animal. There is something scary about them like they are constantly trying to figure out the best method of attack to send you running and screaming in the other direction. I think it is the black beady eyes always watching you even when it seems like it isn’t.

Why do all the really cute or beautiful animals have to be the really dangerous or mean ones? It seems a cruel trick to give such magnificent feathers to a bird that scream, sure get closer to take a better look at my feathers so I can attack you. Other examples include raccoons and polar bears. Raccoons are adorable so it doesn’t really make sense that they are so incredibly mean and evil. Polar bears are beautiful and I want to hug one but they would bite my head off, literally. They are incredibly dangerous despite their cuddly looks and adorable behaviors. It just isn’t fair. Oh well, I will just have to adore these beautiful but dangerous animals from a far, but not too far that my camera can’t get a good shot.


Dead Man’s Light

Monday, January 3rd, 2011

I don’t think I like it but it is an interesting example of short poetry…. which I don’t do plus a picture. Sorry not a lot to post tonight, can you tell 🙂

Shadows retreat
As dawn creeps closer.
The sun claws its way from darkness
Like a dead man from his grave
Chasing away the shadows
Leaving this lighted day.
No more living in darkness
The last thing the dead men say.

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Posted in Photos, Poetry |

Bobbing for Apples

Wednesday, November 3rd, 2010

Bobbing for apples is one of the funniest games to watch ever. Watching people vainly dunk their heads in water and try to scrounge out an apple is pretty entertaining. That being so, this games is really only entertaining when you can stand back and watch the people getting soaked and frustrated. When it is your turn, it is no longer a laughing matter. The duality of bobbing for apples, fun to watch and torture the people doing it, annoying and frustrating when you are being watched and tortured as you try to bob for an apple.

There are several phases of bobbing for apples that the bobbers go through in the process.

  1. Disgust: It is all fun and games until it is your turn. When you get up to the bucket and you are staring down into that gross pail of water filled with a few measly apples you can’t help but think, God please give me an excuse right now to bail out of this game. Of course you don’t get one, and as you kneel down right next to the water you realize something disgusting. That water you are about to shove your face in, mouth wide open, has been the home to several other people’s mouths searching for apples as well. Yes, you are about to dunk your face into a cess-pool of germs to pick out an apple.
  2. Embarrassment: The embarrassment comes in right as you first dunk your head. Then you lift your head out of the water soaking wet and totally embarrassed that first, you don’t have an apple, and second you just ruined your hair, outfit, makeup or any other thing you put on your face that morning. Yes, you are embarrassed to lift your head out of the water, appleless to face your friends who are now dying of laughter because you look like a drowned rat.                                                                     
  3. Frustration: At this point you have gotten past the initial embarrassment and disgust. Because you have already gotten totally soaked, you are now committed and become an unstoppable force of trying desperately to get that apple. You have to get the apple, and fast so you can get out of here. So very quickly your embarrassment at not getting an apple turns into frustration. After time and time again of not getting and apple you are at the point of gnashing violently at the water in a desperate attempt to grab an apple. All sort of tactics to get an apple fly away from your mind, you are a single-minded apple grabbing machine. 
  4. Victory: The final and best phase of bobbing for apples is victory. And the surge of over exuberant energy where you just start smack talking the apple and its mother. At this point your friends look at you like you are crazy and are thinking, geez you were just bobbing for apples. To this I respond. I was bobbing for my life, you wouldn’t understand but that apple had back talked me for the last time!

A little over the top? Maybe, but it is all justified due to that stage of frustration, when you are frustrated any overreaction is justified, even if it ends with yelling at inanimate objects…. which I definitely don’t do. Bobbing for apples is not a simple game, it is actually quite difficult and takes some amount of strategy, which I am not going to share so next time I see you at a party I can watch you fail at bobbing for apples and then when you finally get one and overreact, you will know the truth. The truth that bobbing for apples is a cruel game meant only for the pleasure of those watching, kind of like gladiators.Yeah it is just like that -.-

P.S. Bobbing for apples makes for awesome photos


Black Bird

Thursday, June 24th, 2010

In a dark forest of old oak trees, where no human would enter there was a desperate fluttering of wings and the movement of tangled branches. A baby bird struggled to free itself from the gnarled grip of the trees limbs. It had fallen in the night from its nest and hung in the balance of life and death. Caught by the hands of an old oak tree. It hadn’t yet learned to fly so it was doomed to fall or be set free. Learn to fly fast or die trying.

A girl watched from a short distance away, the bird’s futile attempt to be freed. She knew the forest was a place forbidden and had been told by her elders it was a cursed and evil place. But still she picked herself up from her little stone perch and walked towards the old gnarled tree. She looked up at the bird and the bird looked down on her.

“You are going to fall baby bird and probably die. I want to save you but I don’t know how. If you could lend me your wings, maybe I could use them to save you from that tree.”

“Little girl little girl,” the poor baby bird cried, “please help me, I am too young to die. I will give you my wings, but you will have to learn to fly. I cannot teach you because I too am just a child. If I give you my wings, you could fly up and save me. You have hands that are gentle and could easily remove me from the tangled fingers that embrace me.”

So the little bird lent the girl its wings so the girl could fly and save the birds life. “You have to find my mother to teach you to fly, she said I was not ready yet. But it can’t hurt for you to try. She lives in the very top of the tree, alone in a nest made of black leaves. Look for the black leaves and her dark blue eyes, and then you will know it is my mother. She will teach you how to survive with my wings. Be careful girl, now you have my wings and my life. The trees are a dangerous place for a little girl to be. The birds can be jealous because they cannot leave the trees. You are of the children of the ground and many will try to be like you. Be wary of those with strange colored eyes for they will try to deceive you like they deceived me. They said I could fly but they tricked me, it is how I ended up stuck in this tree. Go fast now because I grow tired and weak. My little fragile heart is dying slowly.”

The little girl climbed up into the great old tree. Winding her way through branches of that twisted oak tree. The farther she went, the darker it got and soon she knew she would never be able to see the black leaves because everything was dark, not just the leaves. She found herself lost with no help in sight. With twigs in her hair and scratches on her hands she curled herself up and began to cry. It shuttered the leaves and brought about the cold wind. The little girl sobbed and didn’t know how to stop.

“What is a little girl like you doing up here where only the birds and leaves belong?”

The girl picked up her head and found a dark bird. It stood there before her with feathers black as coal and eyes that had a gold shine. “What brings you here child from the ground into the world of the children from the sky.”

“I am looking for a mother who has lost her child. A bird who lives in a nest of black leaves. I found the baby bird and she asked me for help. So she gave me her wings to go get some help. Are you a mommy who lives in a black nest?”

“Why yes dear child, and I have lost my baby bird. I guess that you need me to teach you how to use your wings, so you can save my baby child.”

“Yes, that is exactly why I am here. Teach me mother black bird to fly amidst the trees, to navigate the gnarled ways of the old oak tree so I can save the baby bird and bring it back to you safely. I just have one question to ask, why don’t you go save your baby yourself?”

“I can’t you see for I hurt my own wing. For now I am like you. All I can do is sing. I am bound to the ground and cannot fly to save my child’s life.”

So the little girls training began. The black bird taught her to fly so she could save the baby bird. One thing remained that bothered the little girl still. Something the baby bird had said but she couldn’t remember it now.

Now the little girl with twigs in hr hair had learned the techniques and the skill but had not flown, not quite yet. The bird with the golden eyes sat on the branch next to her and said. “It is time now for you to fly. I have given you my knowledge now it is up to you to fly. “

Something didn’t feel right though to the little girl, maybe it was the gleam in the black birds golden eyes. “ Are you sure I am ready, I feel I have just begun to learn.”

“Oh yes dear child, and I am sure your time is short to save the baby bird. Every minute you wait, is one heart beat less of its fluttering heart.”

So the little girl knew she would have to move fast to save the baby’s life. She took a deep breath and opened her eyes. She opened her wings and leaned off the branch. But then she was falling, falling way too fast. The limbs reaching out to claw her as she fell down amongst the trees. Tearing at her and hurting her as she tried to fly. She beat her wings but they were just too weak. Then she remembered the warning from the baby bird, the birds were jealous and would try to trick her. The mother had blue eyes, not gold. She knew she was deceived and like the little bird before her was doomed to fall and die. The little girl tried to let out a scream but it was too late.

The black bird with golden eyes lazily drifted down in spirals from the top of the trees. Singing a quiet song of sweet victory. The bird landed on the little girls back as she lay motionless on the ground. It picked out a few twigs and walked along her back.

“Now I have a body to use so I can become a child of the ground, no more bound by the twisted branches of the cursed oak tree. Free I will be, free at last.”

So the deceitful bird with golden eyes took the little girls body and made it her own. To live, breath, and die as a human would. The only remnants of the birds old past, was a tattoo of a pair of black wings that no one could see.

The baby bird was left to die, also tricked by the evil black bird, without wings or a chance to fight. It’s poor little heart just stopped beating one day. Two birds with one stone fell by the black birds hand. Leaving the old oak tree a few people emptier. With nothing left but the twisted branches of that gnarled old tree reaching out, beckoning to newcomers to enter into the forest where no child of the ground ever leaves.


Confessions of an Evil Driver

Monday, June 14th, 2010

I have a confession to make, about my driving. No I am not admitting that I am a bad driver, because I am not. My confession is this:

I can be an evil driver.

I love road trips, but when you have been driving for hours in the middle of nowhere, you have to find ways to amuse and entertain yourself so you don’t go insane. My remedy? To be EVIL. When there is nothing to look at on the road except for other cars, have fun with the other cars. I am expert, or you could call me an evil genius, at being an evil driver.

You may be wondering, what is it that I do to make me or anyone, an evil driver. There are many ways one could fit the criteria of an evil driver. Here are a few that I do:

  1. Mess with the other drivers. The key to this is to not appear to blatantly be messing with the other drivers. Don’t be obvious, act like you aren’t doing anything or as if this is how you normally drive. One way I do this is with the left lane. Keep in mind this can only be done when several other cars are present (not totally crowded but cars every few minutes or so). When I get really bored I switch into the fast lane and go just fast enough to be passing people, but just slow enough to drive the person behind me crazy. This make it so they have to either pass me in the right lane or just tail gait me and get pissed off and wait until I leave.
  2. Another slight modification of my first point is not letting the person behind you pass when they want. Not just not letting them pass, just not exactly when they want to. This is best to do with those crazy drivers on the road that think everyone will move over when they come speeding up. They are easy to spot, and easy to bother. This can be the most entertaining fun on a long road trip. Again you must have several cars on the road for this to work. Get in the fast lane before these people come up, pass a couple of cars until the road master comes right up behind you. They will probably tail gait you but don’t let it bother you. That is when you slow down just enough to slowly pass the car in the right lane. After you have cleared the car, they will expect ou to immediately get out of their way and into the right lane; don’t. After they figure out you aren’t going into the right lane, even though you should, you know the person behind you, as soon as they clear the car in the right lane, they will switch out of the left lane and try to pass you in the right lane. This is where you act. As you see them start to get into the other lane, speed up just enough so they don’t have enough room to pass you. Then they have to go back behind you in their shame and rage. It is very entertaining to watch them try again and again to pass you. You have to make sure not to make them too angry so after a few times of this actually let them pass. And always, always look at them when they finally pass you. It is pretty funny. Yes, evil I know. Can you blame me? Boredom really is a source of evil.

One thing I am going to point out is that no I do not do this normally. This is not how I drive so don’t worry about it. I only do this on road trips when I am really bored or if a driver is bothering me. The point of being an evil driver is to not push them too far, just enough to get a little reaction but nothing bad. To be a true evil driver you have to understand when the fun has gone to far or where there is room for more mischief. There are always more people on the road to mess with, don’t get attached to a certain car. If you ever go on a road trip with me you can always tell when I start messing with people because I sit there and snicker evilly to myself for no apparent reason.

Don’t be afraid my evil driving, it is very rare, but is very real. Hopefully my evil tips will help save your brain on a long road trip from insanity and boredom. Be evil, but be safe, not stupid.