Archive for the ‘Thoughts’ Category

Happy Mother’s Day

Sunday, May 12th, 2013

Dear Mom,

You are my best friend, my travel buddy, my partner in crime, and the light of my life. I love you in more ways than words can express. I am sorry I can’t be there in person to tell you everything I have to say, but I can start here; Happy Mother’s Day.

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We have traveled the country together, long hours in the car that never got boring or tiresome because we always had something to talk about and even if we didn’t we both enjoyed the silence and the company of one another other. We have wandered down creek beds, climbed trees, fixed flat tires, run across so many different surfaces that I cannot even begin to think of all their names. And oh the places we have gone, the places you have showed me, enjoyed with me and the memories that I have of you, with you, that I will remember and cherish for the rest of my life.

Like the hellish hikes that we simultaneously horribly regret, yet remember with heart filling laughs even though it was horrible at the time. The adventures that failed, but led us to all new places and things.

I love the times when we can be silly, climbing trees, hijacking tractors in the deepest part of the Bryce Canyon, and shamelessly chasing down every roadside attraction we can find.
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Oh the places we have been. How many backdrops have we seen that belong in fairytales? How many times have we watched sunsets in places that are straight out of story books? How many times have I wished to always be back in the places we have been, while always looking forward to our next adventures?

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Caught between the wonderful life you have given me, lived in with me, and the story books found in photography shops or souvenir stores, you have always been there for me. The every faithful travel buddy, the worried mother, the excited best friend, you are everything that I love in life.

Jumping over rattlesnakes and standing waist deep in the Zion Narrows, you and I have been through everything, and I wouldn’t change anything about it.
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You have been there for me in the hardest moments, followed me down the most treacherous paths, squeezed yourself down corridors that seemed impassible just to show me it could be done.  You are incredible, you are super woman, you are my mother.
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I could never wish for anything more than the life you have given me, the oppurtunities I have been blessed to have with you. The coffee and beignets in New Orleans, the trolley car rides, the rivers we have stood at, the canyons we have overlooked, the wildlife we have gaped at, and the world you have shown me. There are too many memories for me to describe, too many things for me to talk about and how much I appreciate every single second of the time we have spent together.
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I love our family, I love the loving home you and Dad have given me, the loving upbringing and the support you have given me my entire life; even when I didn’t realize you were my biggest supporter and friend.
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You make me laugh like no one else I know. How many different ways can I say that I love you? I hope you know that without me ever having to say it. Even when I am away for months at a time, I hope the wind will carry my words to you and carry my love to you so that you always know you are cherished and appreciated.
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I wonder where we will go next, I wonder what is in store for us in the future.
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There are so many wonderful times in the past, but I know you and I have even more memories to be made in the future. Even if it isn’t on the road or out in the back country or by a river bed, we will always have the bond that is unbreakable, the bond between a mother and her daughter.
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The bond between best friends who know exactly how to make you smile and dance even in the most difficult moments.
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The bond between you and I will last the rest of our lives, as will the memories we have and the ones we have yet to make.

You are my inspiration, my hope, my love, my light. I love you mom more than words can say. I wish I could hug you and tell you in person, and I miss you all the time. You are such a wonderful mother and I hope you know that I thank God every day for giving me you.

Happy Mother’s Day Mom, I love you, I love you, I love you.

Your Eternally grateful and loving Daughter,

Monica

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Finding Fantasy in Reality

Wednesday, December 26th, 2012

Some where in the back of my mind I have always known I lived in an exceptional place, it just wasn’t often that I cared to appreciate it. I used to make up stories about adventures in far away lands and imagine myself in a thousand places, anywhere but home. The exciting and the extraordinary was always beyond that next mountain or underneath the crashing waves of the sea, but never did I look at the mountains or the ocean right in front of me.

This is not to say that I didn’t love growing up in Santa Cruz, because I did and still do, it just simply means I never saw the fantastical qualities that I dreamed of in the place where I lived my everyday life. I never realized the fairy circles in the redwoods, or the glint of the sun on the sea, the way the wind swept across grassy hillside like a fingers running through feather soft hair. The world I felt I had to create when I was younger, was the world I was already residing in, I just didn’t know it yet.

Maybe it was when I left for college, or maybe it has been a building wave that has been gathering for some time within me, all I know now is the overwhelming appreciation and awe I have for my home in Santa Cruz.

There is so much I love about Santa Cruz; I realize that I do not have to escape this place to find adventure or fantastical things, I just need to step out of my front door. That is why for Christmas we stuck around town and for our Christmas Day we went hiking along the Davenport Bluffs and then took in the stormy skies from the Santa Cruz Wharf. It is nice to take a vacation in your own town, to make the everyday new again in the most exciting of ways.

Look upon your world with new eyes and see what there is to find. You may just be surprised to behold the imaginary world you spent your whole life searching for.

 

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Reading Places

Friday, December 21st, 2012

I spent a lot of time this semester sitting in a library, neck craned, eyes strained, and brain drained. Even though these places are beautiful in their own majestic academic ways, with towering columns that have held up the burdening weight of university, I can’t help but feel closed in by four walls. There is so much outside those tall grandiose windows that let light drift gently in to illuminate the library walls.

I always sit and watch as the library is lit by the dazzling color of sunset as I sat with my textbooks splayed out in front of me like the casualties of war, thinking of the beauty outside the rows and rows of books that lined the world around me. Yet, even as the colors began to fade to a darker shade and slip farther and farther away, I would remain. Instead of taking a breath and leaving behind my books for a moment, I would dive right back in, but my air never lasted sufficiently. It felt like drowning because it was. Diving back down without a replenishing breath of air is a scary thing, yet almost everyone in that library with me was doing it. Gasping like a fish out of water, watching with wide glassy eyes the cast off colors of a sunset sitting right out side, but like the shadows in Plato’s Cave, we tried to draw real light from only the shadows of reality.

I am tired of the shadows of reality, and I have been growing tired because I have drained these shadows dry and am ready, craving for more. So I have abandoned my beautiful little box for the outside world. I have been drinking in the color of every sunset, and finding every place that one can fit themselves only to sit down and read. The familiar is full of fascinating places to explore that function just as well as a library seat for a place to rest my book. Whether it means climbing rooftops or climbing mountains just for a nice place to cross my legs and lay open a book infront of me, I have been exploring in the name of reading. Even if but for a short while to crack open the spine of a book while over looking the Golden Gate Bridge, or just sitting underneath the shade of a great redwood, or sitting on a cliff above the tumultous sea, I am expanding. I am ready for new horizons, if you need me, I will be at the cusp of the ordinary, waiting.

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Osama Bin Laden

Sunday, May 1st, 2011

Today is an interesting and probably history making day. Today our President Obama made a public announcement declaring that Osama Bin Laden, the figure-head of Al Qaeda, has been killed by American troops in Pakistan.

This event puts us in a strange position for many reasons. The main being that events like this allow us to sit in wonder and realize that in this very moment that history is being made around us. Will I and thousand of others remember this day, or will it be swept away in the tide of our memories. It is a strange thing to be able to take a step back and realize that in this very moment history is being formed. Not just in regards to Osama’s death but events all over the world.

This leads me to ask, what happens next? What are the implications of his death? This moment may very well be a turning point in history. Then again, it may not be. Still it makes me wonder, what next? Where will tomorrow be leading us. Hopefully to a better future for all of us, but you never know. The world is a mysterious place, and we just have to roll with the blows as they come.

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Desert Flower

Sunday, April 24th, 2011

Only life’s most beautiful artifacts can be found were no one would expect life to thrive.

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Tiger

Friday, April 22nd, 2011

A tiger is an extraordinary animal. Strong, powerful, graceful, and dangerous. Not to mention beautiful, the tiger is an embodiment of the savagery of nature that man attempts to tame.

It is sad to see these majestic animals in a zoo, but I am still glad that I was able to see them. It makes me wonder what it would be like to face these animals in the wild as I have seen wolves, coyotes and foxes. How different would this big cat be? Would I be filled with terror or awe as I stared into the mar of these magnificent creatures?

Someday I would like to say that I have done just that. looked this beast in the eye without bars between us. Only then could I or anyone really understand the breadth of the difference between the lives we lead in the city and the life of the creatures in the wild.

For now I will just have to do with looking deep into this creatures eyes as bars separate us.

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Dead Beauty

Monday, February 21st, 2011

It is always the most interesting type of beauty that can be found within the dead and withered objects. The things you believe are beyond the beauty of life and have passed over into a place where only death is. Often, however, it seems that these dead things carry their own beauty. A distinct majesty from the living beauty that stands far a part from any normal type of beauty. It seems there is even beauty in death. The withered and the dying, a beauty that is not from a world we can fully understand. Instead, a beauty that awaits us for a certain time and until then we can not fully understand this withered and dead beauty, just what it could mean.

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Adorable yet Evil Animals

Sunday, January 9th, 2011

The peacock is a truly magnificent animal with dazzling colors, long majestic feathers, and beautiful patterns. However it is actually a relatively mean animal. There is something scary about them like they are constantly trying to figure out the best method of attack to send you running and screaming in the other direction. I think it is the black beady eyes always watching you even when it seems like it isn’t.

Why do all the really cute or beautiful animals have to be the really dangerous or mean ones? It seems a cruel trick to give such magnificent feathers to a bird that scream, sure get closer to take a better look at my feathers so I can attack you. Other examples include raccoons and polar bears. Raccoons are adorable so it doesn’t really make sense that they are so incredibly mean and evil. Polar bears are beautiful and I want to hug one but they would bite my head off, literally. They are incredibly dangerous despite their cuddly looks and adorable behaviors. It just isn’t fair. Oh well, I will just have to adore these beautiful but dangerous animals from a far, but not too far that my camera can’t get a good shot.

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Bobbing for Apples

Wednesday, November 3rd, 2010

Bobbing for apples is one of the funniest games to watch ever. Watching people vainly dunk their heads in water and try to scrounge out an apple is pretty entertaining. That being so, this games is really only entertaining when you can stand back and watch the people getting soaked and frustrated. When it is your turn, it is no longer a laughing matter. The duality of bobbing for apples, fun to watch and torture the people doing it, annoying and frustrating when you are being watched and tortured as you try to bob for an apple.

There are several phases of bobbing for apples that the bobbers go through in the process.

  1. Disgust: It is all fun and games until it is your turn. When you get up to the bucket and you are staring down into that gross pail of water filled with a few measly apples you can’t help but think, God please give me an excuse right now to bail out of this game. Of course you don’t get one, and as you kneel down right next to the water you realize something disgusting. That water you are about to shove your face in, mouth wide open, has been the home to several other people’s mouths searching for apples as well. Yes, you are about to dunk your face into a cess-pool of germs to pick out an apple.
  2. Embarrassment: The embarrassment comes in right as you first dunk your head. Then you lift your head out of the water soaking wet and totally embarrassed that first, you don’t have an apple, and second you just ruined your hair, outfit, makeup or any other thing you put on your face that morning. Yes, you are embarrassed to lift your head out of the water, appleless to face your friends who are now dying of laughter because you look like a drowned rat.                                                                     
  3. Frustration: At this point you have gotten past the initial embarrassment and disgust. Because you have already gotten totally soaked, you are now committed and become an unstoppable force of trying desperately to get that apple. You have to get the apple, and fast so you can get out of here. So very quickly your embarrassment at not getting an apple turns into frustration. After time and time again of not getting and apple you are at the point of gnashing violently at the water in a desperate attempt to grab an apple. All sort of tactics to get an apple fly away from your mind, you are a single-minded apple grabbing machine. 
  4. Victory: The final and best phase of bobbing for apples is victory. And the surge of over exuberant energy where you just start smack talking the apple and its mother. At this point your friends look at you like you are crazy and are thinking, geez you were just bobbing for apples. To this I respond. I was bobbing for my life, you wouldn’t understand but that apple had back talked me for the last time!

A little over the top? Maybe, but it is all justified due to that stage of frustration, when you are frustrated any overreaction is justified, even if it ends with yelling at inanimate objects…. which I definitely don’t do. Bobbing for apples is not a simple game, it is actually quite difficult and takes some amount of strategy, which I am not going to share so next time I see you at a party I can watch you fail at bobbing for apples and then when you finally get one and overreact, you will know the truth. The truth that bobbing for apples is a cruel game meant only for the pleasure of those watching, kind of like gladiators.Yeah it is just like that -.-

P.S. Bobbing for apples makes for awesome photos

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Rocky Horror Picture Show

Sunday, October 31st, 2010

To those of you who have not seen Rocky Horror Picture Show,

  1. SHAME ON YOU
  2. This post probably won’t make any sense because only die-hard fans of Rocky Horror can truly understand other die-hard fans.
  3. If you think you understand this post because you watched the Rocky Horror episode of Glee, and that is the only reason you have ever heard of Rocky Horror Picture Show, SHAME ON YOU MORE. Don’t tell me you get Rocky Horror because you saw weird people on T.V. singing along to the words, it is nowhere near the same thing. Take Glee, add more transvestites, more crudeness, nudity and make up, then, and only then, can we maybe start to talk.

Let me explain first the long months of hoping and planing that went into us doing this. I have been dying to see the midnight showing ever since I first became a die-hard fan of Rocky Horror. Going to this made my life in unexplainable ways. We didn’t get to go to the Rocky Horror Picture Show on Friday but we were able to get tickets for the Saturday night show which was a huge relief. We were so close to not getting in at all, I would have been heart-broken. But we got in and saw it at last. Failure avoided.

On the left is Philomena, who went as Columbia, me in the middle as Magenta (afro and all), and on the right, Sarah as a mixture of a time warp dancer and Columbia. Let me explain my costume for you, it goes like this.

Low cut black dress + maid’s apron, cuffs and head band = slutty maid

slutty maid + afro of teased/ crimped hair = Magenta

Basically that is my costume and it works. The hair was an interesting experience. I never really work my hair so the effort of crimping and teasing it nearly killed me if not for the help of my lovely and amazing friends.

After the struggle with my hair and makeup (as well as some interesting interruptions from my little brother), did we get to go to the show. We got a good place in the line (which went all the way around the block) and had to wait there for an hour to get into the theatre. Waiting in line was annoying in high-heeled boots but we got to see some pretty special people and their costumes. We saw Mario and Luigi, a man dressed up as Little Bo Peep being followed around by about seven women dressed as sheep, and quite a few overweight people shoved into tiny corsets with skin popping out in unimaginable and scarring ways. I saw many things that night that will be burned into my memory for a long, long, time.

We finally got in, during a mad dash for good seats at midnight. Then the fun began. Slugs in Fish-Nets, the UCSC group that puts on the show, got up on the stage to introduce all the actors that would be acting out the movie as it played behind them on the screen. First method of business: Attitude Check

An attitude check is when the entire audience stands up, faces the front stage, flips off the actors and screams about eight times, F@#k You! To test how pumped up the audience is. Very interesting experience.

After that everyone got settled for the movie to start. Because the movie is an interactive experience we all brought little props to use during the movie like noise makers, rice, newspapers, bells, toast, cards, and rubber gloves. During certain parts of the movie everyone uses their props to act out the movie, it is really fun. One of my favorites was using the noise makers during the time warp dance. The whole audience gets up and reenacts the dance. It is really amazing to be in a large group of people, all passionate about one thing and to express that passion in a fun and creative way.

There is some adult content however… like the initiation of virgins. Being a virgin means you have never experience Rocky Horror at a midnight showing before. They take six virgins and vote which has the best costume, one boy, one girl. They then use them to go on stage and perform mock sex on stage. It was horrifying and fascinating and all together funny though inappropriate. Let me just say, I have never seen anything like that in a movie theatre before and probably will never see it again (unless I go to another showing :) ).

By the end, we were all tired but extremely happy. We got out about three and went home. Then came the hard part, getting my hair undone. This included trying to untangle my hair and try to wash it all out. It took quite some time but it was all worth it a hundred times over.It was quite the night, and I will never forget it.  I hope I can do it again soon. Stay true Rocky Horror fans!

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